Yes, I know that it is officially January - the month when our guilt complexes take hold and we suddenly find herbal tea a delightful alternative to wine, bottled/tap water a nutritious substitute for coffee and we stock up on those 100 calorie snack packs (or whatever) in the hopes of changing our hedonist ways (fat chance January... just wait until Valentine's chocolates). But instead of staring forlornly at another high fiber, low sodium, low sugar, low fat and no fun oat crunchy, why don't we all take a ride down memory lane?
Yes, that's right folks, hop in that imagination sport's car and travel with me to: December
*insert flash back music here*
The snow is gently falling, quilting our world outside the window in the soft silence of winter. There is a snap of cold in the air, but inside the oven is toasty. Our hands are warmed with mugs of alcoholized hot chocolate (don't pretend you've never added a drop of Baileys) and the smell of cookies fills the kitchen.
Okay... to be honest, out here are the edge of the universe we got rain instead of snow, but the image stands the test of time.
So, this December, my brother, sister-in-law and adorable nephew traveled the vast expanses of Canada to find my manfriend and me! And (of course) a reward of baking was in order (as well as the earlier mentioned hot chocolate-plus).
Now, I'm pretty sure that one of my first edge-of-the-universe posts was all about making flawless sugar cookies in my new kitchen.
They turned out like this,
But I had family over! This wasn't a time to rest on my laurels. This was a time to turn to the masters and listen to Anna Olson tell me how to do it right. This was a time to blindly follow the recipes of Martha, of Delia Smith, of Betty Crocker - and yes, this is all code for: I went to foodnetwork.ca. But do you know what I found? I found tried tested and true testaments of anonymous foodnetwork addicts praising the glory of Sour Cream.
Saints and Bodhisattva our cookie prayers have been answered, they all seemed to say.
Moist and delicious sugar cookies like you wouldn't believe, they testified.
I was converted. If it was good enough for 'SugarMama73_8' then it was good enough for me.
Look at the picture of last time's cookies.
Remember that image... because here's how the Sour-Cream-Sugar-Cookies turned out. Yes, here is how my guest-welcoming, thank-you-so-much-for-coming-to-see-us, happy holidays sugar cookies turned out....
Its 'The Blob' in cookie form.
What went wrong? Was it the presence of my precious 8 month old nephew? Did he distract me into pouring flour on the floor when it should have gone in the bowl? Was it the sprinkles? Did the confetti of colour and sugar make the batter sad and deflated? Why were my cookies determined to have some sort of migratory/huddling-for-warmth interaction (because that is not where they STARTED on the pan)?
It couldn't be... no...
.... but the hymns of the believers....
...the testments and pictures of flawless cookies...
...NO...
It was...
...no I can't even say it...
...
...
It was the effing sour cream.
Two hours into my conversion I was having a crisis of faith. And so, never again will I try bring sour cream into the baking folds (unless its a sub for another ingredient in cake). No. Sour Cream, you are forever destined to stay in dips and as a topping to latkes.
You hurt me too deeply.
So, in conclusion, New Year's Resolution: do not get sucked in by foodnetwork gospel... they just want you to fail.
