Cheese Biscuits

So, I set the homework aside and I put on that apron. I pulled down my favourite book of recipes. I let the book fall open at random, just to see... and then I flipped through on my own to find a recipe with ingredients I actually had in my house.

Cheese Biscuits. 

Is there a simpler recipe out there, apart from toast? 3 ingredients people. 4 if you're getting fancy with the cheese, which I was not. You have to be a kitchen's worst nightmare to mess these babies up.

I am, apparently, I kitchen's worst nightmare. How, you ask? Well let me tell you. It's all to do with ratios.


Ingredients
3/4 cup flour
1/3 cup butter/margarine
3/4 cup cheese

(SEE? so simple!)

In theory, you use your hands or blender (I don't own a blender, so that one is never an option) to mix all three ingredients together. then you role out the dough and chill it. Then you bake it. TADA!! You have solved the universe's riddle of cheese biscuits. Congratulations! Have a biscuit.

Now, here's what I did. I but in 3/4 cup of margarine to 1/3 cup of flour. And I just couldn't figure out why the consistency was so.... gooey and why my hands were covered in margarine. I glanced at the recipe, just to make sure I had it right, because you know, who screws up cheese biscuits? Right? Then I laughed at myself for a good few minutes and added more flour until the consistency was close to bread crumbs and the cheese mixed in well(ish).

Problem solved!

Problem not solved....

So, here's a fun fact about your oven (I promise it's relevant). Your oven, everyone's oven for that matter has this button/knob/crank/retina-scan that turns up the heat and you can measure that heat in Fahrenheit or Celsius. Recipes will often give you both temperature in case you have a preference. Some books even give you multiple temperature options based on how old your oven is or what brand of baking trays you own. I mean, this is pretty idiot proof stuff. Only a complete moron would set their oven to the wrong temperature after all the hassle their cookbook has gone to of explaining the temperature to them in all its varieties and options.

I am, apparently, a complete moron. Note to self: when the temperature says 190ºC/375ºF, the lower number is the SAME as the higher number. Do not set the oven to 190ºF!!!

So, as you can imagine, I pre-heated the oven, rolled up my biscuits with that wonderful French rolling pin of mine, put my gooey biscuits into the oven and then couldn't figure out why they were taking so long to cook. The recipe said 15-20 min, so why were they still dough after 45 min?

That's when my lovely man-friend noticed my oven error and fixed it (after laughing at me for the better part of a minute).  I was kicked off the kitchen squad and banished to the couch while my man took it open himself to check for when the biscuits were done.

In conclusion, the biscuits are cheesy and herb-y and brittle as crackers. They are dry as a spoonful of cinnamon.... but apparently that is how these sorts of biscuits are SUPPOSED to taste! Yes, despite my best efforts, I did not ruin the biscuits! Although, truth be told, they taste much better with a glass of wine than they'll ever taste on their own.